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Weathering The Storm

itiswellpsychotherapy

Hey beautiful souls,

Last night I was in a major storm in New Mexico and I was absolutely terrified. See this blue dot below? That’s me. See all the red? That’s doom moving towards me. lol. I’ve been in plenty of storms in this country and outside this country however I have never experienced anything like this.

There are so many things that come at us out of the blue, so many situations that come up that we have absolutely no control over. Then what? Do you crumble, still try to run away, avoid, hurt others around you because of the pain you are in? Or do you choose healthier options?

Choosing Healthy Voices

We always have a choice. I could listen to the voice that says ” OMG this is the worst/the end/ doom,” or I could choose a different voice. As I grounded myself (deep calming breaths to slow my heart rate down) I heard two distinct voices that made me laugh and brought me comfort: my mom echoing my grandma! My grandmother lived in Mississippi and we stayed in that state for a while too. During storms, especially if I was at my grandmother’s home there were things that happened every single time. My grandmother would say “Turn everything off, get somewhere and sit down, be quiet and let the Lord do His work.” She (grandma) has been passed on for many years now but I could hear her so clearly in this moment. Anyone else have a grandmother who said similar things?

I didn’t really understand this as a kid and especially didn’t like it if we were watching a good TV show or movie and had to turn it off! But now as an adult I have a new appreciation for it. Although I am not religious anymore I love that what her sentiment was really teaching us: to not be fearful, be patient, and that this to shall pass!

Perception really is key. In that moment I choose to listen to that voice, pull over and stay safe until the storm passed.

Choose Healthy Surroundings

During any difficult time it is so important to be mindful of who is around you. Although I was alone, in my car, on the side of a highway, between two mountains I also was on the phone with one of my best friends. He was able to help me make healthy decisions (stay pulled over and wait, check the radar and try to remain calm) and distract me from fear.

Now we all have those people in our lives that we call when something goes wrong… Take a few moments and think about who those people are in your life. Now ask yourself this: “Do they create more calm or chaos for me?” Oof. Be truthful with yourself. There were two people that came to mind when I was felling terrified. One would have helped me lean into the lense of panic and being terrified and only increased my anxiety, the other helped me create calm. I made a healthy informed choice based on truth.

When things go wrong choosing not to isolate is necessary, but also choosing who we allow into our space is imperative to our healing and survival of difficult moments.

Lightening

I’ve been in plenty of storms in this country and outside this country however I have never experienced anything like this. The lightening was so close to me, so bold, so bright, so unapologetically strong and I was absolutely freaked out seeing as I was driving on a highway between two mountains with torrential rain.

When I got home I started thinking about my thoughts on how I described the lightening and danggit I want to be all of that! BOLD, BRIGHT, UNAPOLOGETIC, STRONG, DEMANDING, FEARLESS, INTENSE IN A BEAUTIFUL WAY.

What would happen if you chose to be a little like lightening in your life today? I want to challenge you to read those words above and see where you can add a little fierceness into your life regardless of the season. Be like lightening. Brighten your future and the lives of those you come in contact with, show up and show out, strike where you want and leave a healthy lasting impression and when the difficult moments come please remember: THIS TOO SHALL PASS!

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Until next time…

It Is Well With My… Digital Nomadism?

itiswellpsychotherapy

Hi beautiful souls,

I read a quote many years ago about doing crazy things and taking risks and it was one of the most beautiful things ever. I made a decision in that moment to start taking risks and to live a very full life and manifest things I desired. The last year of my life has been so beautiful, difficult and amazing in so many ways. I’ve sacrificed a lot, done the hard work in my own personal therapy (Yep! Even your Therapist has a Therapist, your Grand Therapist so to speak..lol), made lifestyle changes and created a thriving business. Well, when you ask for something from the universe, and align yourself through actions, be sure you are ready to receive it.

Many of you know I started my Private Practice It Is Well Psychotherapy LLC (online Psychotherapy services to people in Georgia, Wisconsin, New Jersey and Florida) and It Is Well Relationship Coaching LLC (online Coaching services to anyone in the United States) two years ago and my goal was to go full-time into practice in 2021 and I was able to do that despite a pandemic and many other ridiculous things happening in the world. Business has never been better and I am SO blessed to be able to sit with people in some of their darkest moments and hold sacred space for them to do some very brave healing work. If you are one of my clients reading this just know I am absolutely amazed by you!

Nancy The Digital Nomad

I have made the decision to live a life-long dream of being a Digital Nomad for a bit! You’re probably like wtf is that? Ha! Me too. I knew I wanted to travel freely and still be able to work and with me being able to manifest a business that is completely online I am now able to work from anywhere in the world as long as I have Wi-Fi (or a solid phone connection as a back-up plan). I was doing research and found out this is called being a Digital Nomad and the word just fit! On Tuesday July 20, 2021 I am leaving my home base of Atlanta and heading off to… everywhere? I’ll travel from state to state, starting with the west coast and spend a few weeks or maybe a month in each location and explore what it has to offer. I am hitting New Orleans first (my favorite city so far in the USA), then off to Texas, Oklahoma, New Mexico and planning the rest as I go. Me & my Prius that is. Did I mention I’ll be driving?

But Why?

When I thought about how the opportunity presented itself and started to commit to this new adventure I thought about what I wanted from this experience. There are so many things I am hopeful for. I’ll share a few things I am thinking about now and continuing to process.

  • Wanderlust: I have always had a desire to travel. So far I have been to 12 countries and 13 states, living in 7 of those states. I love meeting new people, learning about new areas and doing all the touristy things as well as getting off the beaten path and exploring. Nancy the explorer!
  • Black Girl Magic: The world needs more of this. Period. Time to spread a little bit of my sparkle around.
  • YOLO Baby: I laughed typing that. But really… if by chance this is my one shot on this earth I want to make the most of it. Especially after 2020; I think we all are more aware of how short life is and how quick things can change. All we have is now and I want to do all the things while I can.
  • Healing: I have parts of me that deserve some extra love and care and I believe spending this time seeking joy and adventure will soothe them in a beautiful way.
  • Being comfortable being uncomfortable: I like to think of myself as a pretty resilient person. On the road I know I’ll run into situations that will be completely out of my control and uncomfortable and I believe in those moments we achieve major growth and character development. I want to practice this skill.
  • Being okay being alone and not lonely: This one is deep for me. There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely. I have experienced loneliness in my life and my goodness it is one of my least favorite things lol. There is a beauty in spending quiet time alone and training the brain to not interpret that as lonely. I’ll write something longer on this at a later date.

Anxiety Management

During this time of transition, reflection, packing and planning I would be lying if I said I didn’t have some major anxiety. Surprisingly there has never been a moment of doubt that this is the right decision but my goodness the anxiety monster has been creeping around! I know many of you may have experienced anxiety and I wanted to take a moment to mentioned some of the coping skills I have used to help me through this difficult time.

  • Grounding myself into the moment: These are things that keep me connected to the tangible and here-and-now. I used deep breathing, and naming or categorizing things to help me with this. For example when I am packing and feeling anxious I’ll stop myself, take deep breaths and tell myself to name all the green things I seen in the room, or 2 scents I smell currently or name all the sounds I currently hear.
  • Speaking manifestations into my mirror: I won’t share all of them but a few things I have been telling myself daily would be “I meet amazingly kind souls to share beautiful experiences with on my journey around the states,” and “I trust the divine timing of my path and give myself permission to do what brings me joy.” Feel free to add these to your list as well. I’ll write more on this at a later date. Powerful stuff… I mean I literally manifested the life I am living.
  • Napping: The amount of naps I have taken in the last 2 weeks have been…. exponential lol. I am a big advocate for rest and listening to your body, my body needed alllllll the naps. When I woke up I often felt fresher and ready to tackle whatever tasks I needed to complete.
  • Exercise: I’ve been boxing and running/ long walks a ton! Did ya’ll know I box? Getting your heart rate up changes brain chemistry, increasing the availability of important anti-anxiety neurochemicals, including serotonin, gamma aminobutyric acid (GABA), brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF), and endocannabinoids. The endocannabinoid system is a nerve signaling system throughout the human body that helps maintain physiological, emotional and cognitive stability. Exercise activates frontal regions of the brain responsible for executive function, which helps control the amygdala, our reacting system to real or imagined threats to our survival. Move that body, especially when you don’t want to!

Hey Siri, Please Play “On the Road Again”…

So… here goes nothing! Nancy, the Digital Nomad is off. While I am traveling I will be blogging about this as much as I can, documenting things on IG because that’s what the cool people do apparently, exploring as many cool places as I can, having dope interactions with souls I meet as well as finding and healing parts of me that deserve attention, love and effort. I am hopeful that this blog will serve as a place for me to be vulnerable, retain memories, talk about mental health issues in our society, provide resources on healing and also talk about the cool things I do in these places so that when you visit them you can see for yourself! I think as time goes it will morph into what it should be and I am thrilled to be back writing again.

Shameless Plugs

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Be Brave

I want to encourage you to take brave calculated risks, life a full-life, embrace uncertainty & be a badass in the way you know how! I plan on practicing what I preach. Ask yourself how you can add something to your life that you have been craving or needing. It’s time…